help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
