put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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