No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
