i just wanna soil my oats bro
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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