all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
