Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
She told me I should be a condom model.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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