the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
