If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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