Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
