I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
