just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize