'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
