I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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