so that wasnt chicken after all
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
