somebody snuck up and got me drunk
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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