Kareoke will never be a sober sport
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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