here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
