is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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