I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize