im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
