i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
