I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
