I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
