i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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