my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize