census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
