Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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