Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
