So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
