so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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