what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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