Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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