It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
