I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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