just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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