you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
