her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
