Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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