it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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