Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
