the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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