I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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