I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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