Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
