i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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