Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
