There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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