I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
