Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
