if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
